Horses Cut Shop


What is a "size", really, besides a judgment. For the most part we can't help what our size is. Sure, maybe we eat too much or have a fondness for that tape worm that robs us of our nutrition but by and large, we are who we are. So when it comes to fitting you with a t-shirt, we've got you covered. I'm not one for puns but it's late and such a softball is hard to pass up.

XTRA XTRA LARGE: This is as big as we go. A XXXL cat could wear the XXL but he'd have to be carefull on the pull-up bar as the more than two and a half feet of garment between his neck and groin is going to hike up no matter how we stitch it. And unless you're Lyle Alzado (God rest his soul) you've most likely got a little partner down around the middle who's going to get a face full of air if you try. That said, our XXLs are stitched just like the smaller sizes with a healthy allotment of thread on the seams to keep your Lou Ferigno physique under wraps during brawls, jail breaks and late night horse play.

XTRA LARGE:  Rumor has it that Denzel Washington wears an XL. I don't by it. My cousin has a friend who delivers pipe to some of the production houses down in LA and he said Denzel needed an extra hand stepping up onto a tailgate of a taco truck. The XL is go to size when you're big enough to be mistaken for an athlete but still small enough to see your pecker in the shower.

LARGE: Meet the white bread of shirt sizes. This is, hands down, our most popular size. It fits like a large, and provides enough options for a medium sized guy to over eat or contract some swelling in the joints and still look like a champ. An XL can easily drop down to a L if he can still fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run (thank you Rudyard Kipling).

MEDIUM: The mediums among us are a lucky lot. Their silhouette is ripe for being an on-screen actor, fighter pilot, guitar tech or teen idol. These men will find the Medium to be right up their alley. Our stitching is optimized for this fit as it allows the wearer a full 360 degree range of movement if their can somehow pull that off physiologically.

SMALL: Slight, wiley, pocket-sized... call it like you will but make no mistake, just because something is small doesn't mean it won't royally fuck you up. (Please see" fire crackers, Bruce Lee, Kidney Stones.) We take great pride in providing a solid garment for our modest friends. Same quality print, but with less to catch on fire.

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